I feel like I’m at a standstill,
Whilst I watch this world rush past me,
I’m trying to just take a brief moment,
But a blink feels like an eternity,

I’m still trying to figure it out what I actually want from my life,
But I don’t think I will ever know,
So I settle for the smallest moments of happiness,
But the lack of self-love is starting to show,

I really don’t expect much from my limited time,
I just want a smile that is real,
To look forward to my tomorrow,
And to understand that it’s ok that, this is how I feel,

But this world is going by me so goddamn fast,
And my life….. even quicker,
I spend every damn day trying to repair and get better,
But in reality I am only getting sicker,

I am so tired and warn out,
My body and mind needs to rest its weary frown,
But I might not actually ever be able to start up again,
If I ever did slow down,

Don’t get me wrong, I won’t ever give up,
Well, I hope I don’t anyway,
But the demands of life has made me so fatigued and tired,
That I needed to rest on a day long before yesterday,

And I’m doing what life asks of me,
Which is not living my life my way,
And all based on the promise,
That I might actually be able to finally rest one day,

I suppose I just need to escape the madness,
The pure Insanity that is now called normal and mundane,
But I am simply just the soul of a single cell,
That was given a time slot, number and a name,

So other than moments like this,
I don’t think or question it too much,
Cos my whole existence compared to earths,
Barely makes a dent or touch,

So this world can keep spinning,
And I will spend the rest of my days on my feet,
And I look forward to the fear of the unknown,
The day I might actually be able to sleep.

Wrote on: 18/12/2023